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ooh ahh just a lil' bit

*twitch twitch*

I am a pretty tolerant person. Or so I think.. I definitely am not on board with anything religion related, however I never stand up to rant or judge anyone who chooses to go down that path. Clearly. My mother's entire family is super religious and out of respect I do a great job of never letting on that I am not religious or to contradict anything they may feel or say.

That being said!
I found myself watching a video on youtube for "Gotcha Day" and a domestic adoption. Normally I don't watch these videos because once I start I cannot stop and next thing I know an hour has been spent sobbing at sad videos of babies being placed into the arms of their new parents. As a birth mom, no matter how much you have grown or changed since your adoption, being immersed in it will always tug at your heart strings. Or at mine, at least.

What got me most about this one video though, is how much they said "HE changed our lives forever. HE made this possible." Which.. alright, fine. Then Adria REALLY flew off the handle when the screen caption read:
"We PRAISE HIM for this PRECIOUS gift!"

... yeeeah, about that. I'm sorry but I think that the girl (who, by the way.. is never mentioned or given credit for her loss) is the real reason they are getting this gift, their child. I know for religious people God is like a blue print, where everything starts from.. but I guess as a birth mom, I think this girl out there deserves a hell of a lot more credit for the huge, life altering decision she made and let HER be the reason they are filled with such happiness and love.

I'm still on very little sleep and kinda grumpy about it. Can ya tell?


I haven't read too far back in your journal but you do seem very tolerant, indeed!

Agreed that birth mom deserves to (at the very least) acknowledged.
I try!

aand it's still a week later and I am ranting in my head about the whole subject. haha.
i would say "amen" to this post, but that would be inappropriate. i fucking hate religion.
hahaha. Just say "word" instead. It conveys pretty much the same point. As for religion, ugh.. So do I. I am understanding but the way it makes some people act and how easily it makes amazing people forgotten for what THEY did, grr..

My Eric is not being raised in a house with religion.. It was a huge part of my adoption plan. I asked that his parents don't ever shove religion down his throat and while I was okay with spiritual people and beliefs, I didn't want my son raised in a house where he was expected to go to church two times a week without ever asking to on his own. Catherine and Jim are amazing and also very much not religious.

I also asked that they try to have a lot of music in his life.. said it would mean the world to my dad (Grandpa Roger!) if Bob Dylan could be a part of Eric's soundtrack growing up since both my dad and I are obsessed with him. They followed through with that, too. Damn I'm lucky! :)


I've shared my mom's story a few times on booj when adoption comes up. It's very heavy, but you're welcome to read it anytime. I do mean heavy. I'll link you if you do.

<3. Sending you a lot of love. My mom was a first mom too.

(I am also not religious at all)

Re: <3

I would love to read it!! When adoption first came into my life I would literally spend hours finding anything I could about it. I found a lot of the birthmom blogs and communities were VERY religion based and while I am not one to judge anyone for their beliefs, I just couldn't let my guard down enough to get immersed into it. All I would read is "Jesus this, God that" and it would make me angry.

Even six years later, I still read/watch anything based on adoption. I would love to see the perspective of a birth mom who hasn't had the same outcome I did. Thank you so much!

Re: <3

I am actually antitheist. I think religion causes actual harm.


Her story is here. She is one of a generation of girls who were "sent away". It's a very sad story.

I also have a my mom tag. She's so great.

Re: <3

How awful.. The losing a son twice line has had me crying off and on for the last two hours.
Did she receive pictures of him when he was older, so she knew what he had looked like?
The stigma of shame that was placed on these poor girls makes me ill. Like some dirty secret that needs to stay hidden no matter what. My heart hurts for your Mom.

Re: <3

Are you allergic to any nuts or anything?
I don't mean to come off as cocky but I make the best granola ever.All from scratch.. even down to infusing the honey with raspberries & lemon a week before I use it. (now I sound REALLY cocky. lol)

If you aren't allergic I will sooo send you some of it.